*This blog has been written by a guest blogger. Like me, she's also an African-American in her late twenties. She was married earlier this year and now lives in Arkansas.
That's right, bastard. All my life I've been a bastard. I'm not being rude or disrespectful, as a matter of fact, I think I am a very nice person. I mean bastard in the way that Merriam-Webster defines it, an illegitimate child. Not only am I illegitimate, I had no idea who my father way, not a name, nothing...until earlier this month.
Life is crazy. I am currently addicted to MySpace. I teased my husband unmercifully when he opened an account, but it didn't take long for me to follow in his footsteps. MySpace is great! You can reconnect with old friends and keep in contact with new ones. But MySpace does have a bad side: pedophiles, spam, and unwanted advances. At first I thought MySpace was immune to spam but everyday I'm bombarded with friend requests and messages from people who want me to refinance a house I don't have, buy diet pills, get free ringtones, etc.
So I wasn't the least bit intrigued when I checked my account and saw I had a shitload of friend requests and new messages from people I didn't know. But what did intrigue me was an email to my personal address from a "cousin". Usually I delete emails from people I don't know without even opening them, but for some reason I read this one. As I read the email, I realized that even though I had no idea who she was, this lady knew me. She knew all sorts of personal information about me. But what surprised me the most is that she said my "father" was so happy to finally find me and that actually it was my "brother" that found me on MySpace. On MySpace!
When I talked to my father, it was a surreal experience. Logically, I knew I had a father; but emotionally, I never did. I've never longed for a father nor felt a void in my life. If not the for not-so-chance meeting through MySpace, I would have never sought him out. I wasn't bitter or nothing, just uninterested.
Three weeks later, I have talked to everyone on my father's side. From the immediate family, I have three additional sisters and one brother, two aunts, seven cousins, a stepmother, and a stepsister. Crazy isn't it! The most shocking part of it all is that they have been looking for me since I was six years old! They have memories, pictures, and stories of me from birth to six years - I have none of those. I know I have a horrible memory, but this is ridiculous!
My mom and I have never discussed my father, not once! So when I told her about these strangers claiming to be my family, she nonchalantly said, "Yeah, that's probably your dad. Are you gonna call him?" To this day, that is all we have ever said about my father. Talking to him is refreshing, he is genuinely nice; but it is also overwhelming. He is so happy to have finally found me. The adults in the family have all written Montel, Maury, Donahue, Jenny Jones, etc. looking for me! It's great to be so loved.
Next thing up, mini family reunion in Vegas next month! Viva Las Vegas!
Life is crazy. I am currently addicted to MySpace. I teased my husband unmercifully when he opened an account, but it didn't take long for me to follow in his footsteps. MySpace is great! You can reconnect with old friends and keep in contact with new ones. But MySpace does have a bad side: pedophiles, spam, and unwanted advances. At first I thought MySpace was immune to spam but everyday I'm bombarded with friend requests and messages from people who want me to refinance a house I don't have, buy diet pills, get free ringtones, etc.
So I wasn't the least bit intrigued when I checked my account and saw I had a shitload of friend requests and new messages from people I didn't know. But what did intrigue me was an email to my personal address from a "cousin". Usually I delete emails from people I don't know without even opening them, but for some reason I read this one. As I read the email, I realized that even though I had no idea who she was, this lady knew me. She knew all sorts of personal information about me. But what surprised me the most is that she said my "father" was so happy to finally find me and that actually it was my "brother" that found me on MySpace. On MySpace!
When I talked to my father, it was a surreal experience. Logically, I knew I had a father; but emotionally, I never did. I've never longed for a father nor felt a void in my life. If not the for not-so-chance meeting through MySpace, I would have never sought him out. I wasn't bitter or nothing, just uninterested.
Three weeks later, I have talked to everyone on my father's side. From the immediate family, I have three additional sisters and one brother, two aunts, seven cousins, a stepmother, and a stepsister. Crazy isn't it! The most shocking part of it all is that they have been looking for me since I was six years old! They have memories, pictures, and stories of me from birth to six years - I have none of those. I know I have a horrible memory, but this is ridiculous!
My mom and I have never discussed my father, not once! So when I told her about these strangers claiming to be my family, she nonchalantly said, "Yeah, that's probably your dad. Are you gonna call him?" To this day, that is all we have ever said about my father. Talking to him is refreshing, he is genuinely nice; but it is also overwhelming. He is so happy to have finally found me. The adults in the family have all written Montel, Maury, Donahue, Jenny Jones, etc. looking for me! It's great to be so loved.
Next thing up, mini family reunion in Vegas next month! Viva Las Vegas!
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